Friday, July 30, 2010

friendly neighbors

we live on a quiet street with about six houses on one side and a factory on the other. we are friendly with all our neighbors, but david is especially friendly with the guy (name: munch) at the end of the street who has approximately eight kids, a green house and a green cadillac to match. he just called up david and explained that he and his woman are staying at the knight's inn this evening, "you know, to get away from all them fuckin kids for a minute." david said he was heading over to that side of town and munch asked him for a huge favor.
"could you bring somethin out this way for us? it's a big favor man, my fault, my fault. just stop by our house on the way, check on the kids, check on the little one and if she ain't in bed, make sure she headin that way. and one more thing, my fault, man. get my boy to get the dvd player and put it in a bag for you, and tell him to put the grown-up movie in there too."

Thursday, July 29, 2010

reading roundup no. 1

these were sho's first library books checked out (age: 3 weeks) and i was going to joke about how tana hoban is totally sho's favorite author, writing gripping tales that keep sho up late at night with their elaborate plot twists and unparalleled character development, but then i looked up tana hoban and found out that she was actually this really neat-sounding, famous photographer who died in paris a few years ago at the age of 88. her work was exhibited at the museum of modern art and spans seven decades, she started the group "americans for peace" in paris and led protest marches at the us embassy, and (according to her obituary) her approach to photography and children's books was considered revolutionary.

tana hoban, i underestimated you.

"Through my photographs and through open eyes I try to say, 'Look!' There are shapes here and everywhere, things to count, colors to see and always, surprises." -- Tana Hoban, from an autobiographical essay written in 1979.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

parental nightmare porn

1. the woman who forgot her baby was in the car during the summer and went to work all day

2. jews hiding in attic, nazis are downstairs searching for them and the baby cries. can't get baby to stop crying. one of the hiding jews is forced to suffocate the baby to save the rest

3. this one happened to someone i know. family gets into minor car accident on the highway, pulls over to assess damage. man walks to the backseat to get baby and a truck plows into the car, killing them both. the mother is the only survivor

these scenarios are each so terrible that i can't even think about them, therefore i like to think about them all the time.

the many faces of shoshanna mary

1. empress/cupcake queen face. it is fat and double-chinned and says with authority from the heights of a velvet throne, "hmph. give me a cupcake."

2. wonder face. best featured when david carries her high above his head, an expression of calm astonishment on her face. much like fat empress face, wonder face says "i am queen of everything i behold."

3. stretching face. this one is an honor to observe. her fanny sticks out very prominently while stretching, much like the mother of one of my uncle's students, a woman who could reportedly "balance a stack of books on [her] ass." while stretching, our sho looks just like a dear little turtle named mortimer.

may 28, a letter to sho

you are here! today is your fifth day on earth. we are so in love with you and everything you do.

you smiled from the first day you were born, always in your dreams. you seem more connected to "what comes before" than being alive on earth right now, which is sometimes difficult even though it is really such a beautiful honor to be around someone so new - especially you. i want you to stay on earth and i want your stay on earth to be a good one. but for now you are mostly living in your dreams.

sometimes you gaze around with a quiet look on your face, your mouth hanging wide open, as if everything you see is jaw-droppingly unbelievable. which i guess it really is.


boy, i sure am large these days. it's interesting because getting big happens so gradually that you really start to feel like you've always felt this way and will never be able to walk up the stairs without panting and gripping the handrail dramatically ever again. it also has gotten to the point where you just have to look at yourself and go, woah that girl has gotten herself into quite the pickle. because you have to get that baby out somehow...and the mind reels when pondering the specifics.

is this thing on

this is an experiment, hello internet! i am "blogging" from the very room pictured on the right, which is located on a quiet street on the north side of kalamazoo michigan. my best friend david and i are having a baby in approximately one month. we are so excited to meet our very own pal and pat its little fanny.

it sure is easy to make baby-sized legwarmers out of socks, maybe too easy...